Dr Chloe Paidoussis-Mitchell’s The Loss Prescription is well titled. The principles and exercises (called “prescriptions” in the book’s terminology) are mostly generic and aren’t focused on any specific type of loss – it could be a death, a divorce or a serious physical injury. Chloe guides the reader through standard tools like mindfulness, meditation (particularly Metta aka love and kindness), CBT and guided journaling, to help navigate the recovery from loss. Anything that causes a sense of loss and a feeling of grief could be helped by the principles discussed.
I personally found this book after an intensely emotional year: a serious heart attack in the autumn was followed by my son’s suicide in the spring. I found this book in the summer, and it gave comfort to those sleepless pre-dawn mornings spent sobbing on the kitchen floor with my dog. Between the floods of tears and the “grief brain” that made concentration difficult, it took over seven months to complete this book. But it helped.
The book covers the full range of grief, and I often found chapters aligned with the timing of my emotional journey. Chloe discusses the immediate aftermath, how nature and mindfulness can offer support, and how to use other techniques to quieten those constant “what ifs”, “could haves”, “should haves” – that destructive inner monologue that can so often become overwhelming.
She goes on to offer practical tips for dealing with life changes that will inevitability follow loss. For me, I now struggle with social anxiety, even when meeting close friends one-on-one, and she recommends mindful grounding techniques.
Importantly, the book doesn’t just focus on your responses, it discusses the societal complexities of grief, such as within the workplace, and the potential indifference of friends and family, and how to be grateful for those pillars who go above and beyond. Towards the end there’s a section on the unique characteristics of suicide, such as navigating the weight and guilt of the self-imposed blame, whether rightly placed or not. And finally, Chloe makes suggestions on legacy, how to honour the loss with dignity and respect.
An excellent book, well written, with compassion, highly recommended for anyone struggling with what life throws at them.